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December 2015 Archives


My credit union tells me their website will be down Saturday night for upgrades. This not only means that they don't have a good DevOps-style rapid release CI/CD system, but that they have no respect for their IT group who should not have been required to spend this week and the entire weekend planning for the upgrade. They should be spending this weekend at the movie theater watching the force awakens.

This is disrespectful of their employees and shows a lack of good management. How could management expect people to focus on a critical upgrade this week?

DevOps isn't just a software release methodology. It is a way to make your work environment predictable, stress-free, and pleasant.

Posted by Tom Limoncelli in Rants

*Lately there has been a renewed debate over the use of encrypted communication. Terrorists could be using encryption to hide their communication. Everyone knows this. The problem is that encryption is required for ecommerce and just about everything on the web.

Should encryption be banned? regulated? controlled?

Lately there have been a number of proposals, good and bad, for how to deal with this. Luckily I have a solution that solves all the problems!

My solution: (which is obvious and solves all problems)

change_your_password.pngMy solution is quite simple: Every time a website asks you to create or change a password, it would send a copy to the government. The government would protect this password database from bad people and promise only to use it when they really really really really really need to. Everyone can still use encryption, but if law enforcement needs access to our data, they can access it.


I've received a number of questions about my proposal. Here are my replies:

Q: Tom, which government?

Duh. THE government.

Q: Tom, what about websites outside the U.S.?

Ha! Silly boy. The internet doesn't exist outside of the U.S. Does it? Ok, I guess we need a plan in case countries figure out how to make webpages.

For example if someone in Geneva had the nerve to create a website, they'd just turn the passwords over to their government who would have an arrangement with the U.S. government to share passwords. This would work because all governments agree about what constitutes "terrorism", "due process", and "jurisprudence". Alternatively these Genevaians could just turn the passwords over to the U.S. directly. They trust us. Right?

Q: Tom, what if the government misuses these passwords?

That won't happen and let me explain why: There would be a policy that forbids that kind of thing.

If they have a written policy that employees may not view the passwords or use them inappropriately, it won't happen. I believe this because in past few years I've seen CEOs make statements like that and I always trust CEOs. I believe in capitalism because I'm no dirty commie hippy like yourself.

Q: Tom, how do we define when the government can use the database?

3348566.jpgDude. What part of "really really really really really" didn't you understand? They can't just really really really really need to use one of those passwords. They have to really really really really really (5 reallys!) need to use it!

Q: Tom, what if someone steals the government's database?

Look, the government has top, top, people that could protect the database. It would be as simple as protecting the codes that launch nuclear missles.

Q: Tom, doesn't the OPM database leak prove this is unworkable?

What? Why would the government name a database after one of the best Danny Devito movies ever? Look, that movie was fictional. If you aren't going to take this debate seriously, stay out of it. Ok?

Q: Tom, wouldn't this encourage terrorists to make their own online systems?

Dude, you aren't paying attention. They'd be required to turn their passwords over to the government just like everyone else! If they don't, we know they are terrorists!


Hi. Thank you for reading this far.

Obviously the above proposal is not something I support. It is a analogy to help you understand that the FBI and other law enforcement organizations are proposing. When you hear about "law enforcement backdoor" legislation or requiring that phones be "court unlockable" this is what they mean.

The proposed plans aren't about passwords but "encryption keys". Encryption keys are "the technology behind the technology" that enables passwords to be transmitted across the internet securely. If you have a company's encryption keys you can, essentially, wiretap the company and decode all their private communication.

Under the proposal, every device would have a password (or key) that could be used to gain access to the encryption keys. The government would promise not to use the password (key) unless they had a warrant. We'd just have to hope that nobody steals their list of passwords.

Obviously neither of these proposals are workable.

This debate is not new. 20 years ago FBI and NSA officials went to the IETF meetings (where the Internet protocols are ratified) and proposed these ideas. In 1993-1995 this debate was huge and nearly tore the IETF apart. Finally cooler heads prevailed and rejected the proposals. It turned out that the FBI's predictions were just scare tactics. None of their dire predictions came true. "Indeed, in 1992, the FBI's Advanced Telephony Unit warned that within three years Title III wiretaps would be useless: no more than 40% would be intelligible and in the worst case all might be rendered useless. The world did not "go dark." On the contrary, law enforcement has much better and more effective surveillance capabilities now than it did then." (citation)

We must reject these proposals just like we did in the early 1990s. Back then most American's didn't even know what "the internet" was. The proposals were rejected in the 1990s because of a few dedicated computer scientists. Today the call to reject these proposals should come from everyone: Sysadmins, moms and dads, old and young, regardless of political party or affiliation.

All the encryption lingo is overwhelmingly confusing and technical. Just remember that when you hear these proposals, all they're really saying is: The FBI/NSA want easy access to anything behind your password.

The new edition of ACM Queue Magazine is out. My column (called "Everything Sysadmin") answers 1-2 questions per issue. This issue's questions are:

Q: Dear Tom, How can I devalue my work? Lately I've felt like everyone appreciates me, and, in fact, I'm overpaid and underutilized. Could you help me devalue myself at work?


Q: Dear Tom, We have a very simple on-call schedule, but all the substitutions needed during December make it quite complex. How should we organize it better? For example, our team has a week-long on-call schedule [Monday to Monday]. During November and December, however, there is a flurry of e-mail with people requesting to trade days to accommodate various family and holiday responsibilities. How can we manage all these trades without a zillion e-mails?

(These two questions are unrelated.)

To read my answers visit acmqueue is free for ACM professional members, and reasonably priced for everyone else. It can be read online, on iOS and Android.


Update: Someone asked what this is all about. The ACM is the Association for Computing Machines, the world's largest educational and scientific computing society. I have been an ACM member since 1988. For the last 4-5 years I've been volunteering with ACM Queue by writing articles and being on the advisory board. My new column appears three times a year. The ACM has a reputation for being rather academic, but my volunteer efforts have all been with projects that bend the ACM to be more relevant to software developers and system administrators.

Posted by Tom Limoncelli in ACM Queue Column

This month's NYCDevOps meeting (hosted at the HQ) has special guest speakers Bridget Kromhout and Casey West talking about running Docker images in Cloud Foundry's Elastic Runtime and orchestrating containerized workloads on Lattice.

  • Date: Tuesday, December 15, 2015
  • Time: 6:30 PM
  • Place: The Stack Overflow HQ (near Wall St.)
  • You must RSVP and bring an ID to get into the building.

You should join me at this Meetup. Check it out and RSVP!

Posted by Tom Limoncelli in CommunityDevOps

I write a column in ACM Queue magazine called "Everything Sysadmin" (guess where I got the idea for the name?). It appears 3 times a year.

The new issue is out and contains a column that answers 2 questions: one is "How can I devalue my work?" and the other is about scheduling substitutions for oncall schedules.

Queue is free to ACM members (use your ACM account username/password). You can purchase a 1-year subscription for $19.99 or buy a single issue for $6.99.

To read the issue online or via the Queue App (iPhone and Android), go here:

Posted by Tom Limoncelli in ACM Queue Column

Adam Bertram wrote an excellent piece in InfoWorld: 7 signs you're doing devops wrong

Posted by Tom Limoncelli in DevOps

If you ran a Novell network, especially in the late 80s or early 90s, I hope you watched The Late Show with Stephen Colbert last night when he interviewed Steve Carell and talked about their brief work for Novell.

Posted by Tom Limoncelli in Funny

Call for Participation is open at

The conference will be in Seattle, WA, on March 11-12, 2106. Submit your proposal by December 25th.

If you've never given a presentation at a conference before, consider submitting to a regional conference like Cascadia. It is less intimidating and the audience is very friendly!

Posted by Tom Limoncelli in Conferences

I'll be giving a presentation called "Transactional System Administration Is Killing Us and Must be Stopped" at the January 2016 meeting of BackBay LISA (BBLISA). This is the same talk I presented recently at LISA, which was very well received.

It includes a preview of material from our upcoming 3rd edition of The Practice of System and Network Administration.

For more information about the talk, directions to the meeting, and so, on, visit the BBLISA website at

Posted by Tom Limoncelli in Speaking