I know y'all can't live without another update so here it is.
The VerizonSupport twitter account sent me a secret URL to give them my account info and problem description. After filling it twice (separated by 2 days), I got no phone call, no email, no results.
Today I called and was told that the IVR system transfered my phone call to billing because I was entering my phone number (as asked) but since I don't have Verizion phone service it was confused. That is the phone number on my account, and it certainly is able to look up my account after I've entered it, but the person assured me that this was the problem. I should select the option where I enter my account number instead of my phone number and it should work.. promise.
When I got home (where I have the account number) I did as requested and of course the system said it is transferring my account to billing.
So what to do?
Well, I've tried billing and tech support with no luck. I decided to call sales. Stephanie and I had an ok conversation. She said that last month my account was "in treatment" and now it definitely isn't so there should be no outage on Wednesday. I pointed out that the IVR system disagrees, but she said I should "let it go". She also said that if I do have an outage on the first of the month, they can cancel the account and recreate it. I'd have a 20 minute outage. She wrote all of this up in my account notes.
Wednesday I'll be "oncall" for work from 4pm to midnight. If there is an outage in the morning, I'll be spending all day getting it fixed so that I can have connectivity for my oncall shift.
I've spent more than 10 hours on the phone with Verizon at this point.